Broken
by ChristyK
Summary: Sam tries to find a way out of his depression, unfortunately it's the wrong way
1. Chapter 1

This is another one I wrote way back before the secret was revealed. It's just another stupid little story that popped into my head. This one doesn't have much of a plot so I don't know if you'll like it, I hope so but…..

**Broken**

Sam sat on the edge of the bed in the motel room staring at his blood covered hands. He felt exhausted. But not only exhausted, he just felt empty. He listened to the sounds of Dean shaving in the bathroom. They had just come back from a successful hunt and he could tell his brother was looking forward to hitting the bars for a few hours to celebrate. He knew Dean would be expecting him to go out with him tonight but the truth was he had no desire to. All he wanted was to lie down and die. Die? Had he really thought that? Didn't he mean lie down and get some rest? Yeah, that's what he meant.

"Come on Sam let's get moving." Dean said as he came out of the bathroom and noticed that Sam still had on his blood splattered hunting clothes. "The bars are only open for a few more hours and I'm in the mood for love." He said as he splashed cologne on his neck.

"You know Dean, maybe I'll sit this one out."

"You sick or something?" Dean said as he walked over and stood in front of his brother.

"No, I just don't feel like going out."

"Why? What's wrong now Sam? You've been acting like your dog died for the last few days. What's up?"

"Nothing, can't I just not want to go out?"

"Ahhh come on, it'll do you good."

Sam didn't feel like arguing with Dean so he went into the bathroom and removed his bloody clothes. He tossed them into the corner of the bathroom on top of Dean's hunting clothes. Sometime later they needed to hit the Laundromat. If anyone saw the blood on their clothing there would be a lot of questions that they knew no one would believe the answers to. He knew he should shower but instead just washed his hands and put on clean clothes. Dean might be spending the night looking for love but he knew he wouldn't be. He still missed Jess and had no desire to look for a replacement, even if it was only for a one night stand. He and Jess had been planning on getting married after they graduated from college. But his hopes and dreams had been shattered the night she died. An overwhelming feeling of loneliness came over him and he leaned against the sink and looked into the mirror. He hadn't been sleeping well and he could see the dark circles under his eyes. His mom was dead, Jess was dead, and now his dad was gone…. All he had left was Dean and that should be enough. And it was, at least he thought it was….but what if he lost Dean….What if something happened to Dean and he was all alone. The thought terrified him.

"Come on Sammy let's go!" Dean yelled from the bedroom interrupting his thoughts.

Sam looked in the mirror and ran his hand through his hair then walked into the bedroom.

"You look like hell Sam, at least comb your hair."

Sam once more ran his fingers through his hair.

"Oh that's a lot better." Dean said sarcastically.

"You're so anxious to go, well then let's go."

Dean was going to snap back with a wisecrack but something about the look on his brother's face made him stop.

"Sam you look like shit, are you feeling okay? Tell me the truth."

"I feel fine Dean, let's go." Sam grabbed his jacket and headed for the door.

Dean was starting to get worried as he watched Sam walk away. Something definitely was bothering him, but what it was he had no idea. He picked up his jacket and followed his brother to the car.

**The Bar**

When they got to the bar they played a few rounds of pool of which Dean won every round. He could tell Sam wasn't even trying to win. He played well, but Dean could tell his heart wasn't in it. Soon some men challenged Dean to a game and Sam walked over to the bar and sat down while Dean took them on.

Sam sat at the bar drinking beer after beer and just staring at his glass between sips. The man sitting next to him watched for awhile and finally spoke up.

"You look a little down buddy."

Sam heard the man's voice but wasn't really paying any attention to what he said not realizing he was talking to him.

"You okay buddy, you seem a little down?" The man repeated.

"Oh, oh I'm sorry…." Sam said glancing over at the man. "I didn't know you were talking to me."

"That's okay. You just seem like you lost your best friend."

"No, no nothing like that." Sam gave a little smile. "Just tired."

"Looks more then just tired to me…. I got a little something that might perk you up." The man reached in his pocket and pulled out a blue pill. "This will cure what ails you." The man glanced around the bar then laid the pill in front of Sam.

"No thanks." Sam pushed the pill back toward the man. "I'm not into that."

"Hey, why don't you keep it." The man pushed the pill back toward Sam. "You never know when you might need a little something to get you through the day."

Sam didn't feel like going back and forth with the man so he picked up the pill and put it in his pocket.

"Thanks." He said as he downed his beer.

"Try it, I'm sure you'll like it…and there's plenty more where that came from."

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks for the reviews, hope you're not disappointed with the rest of the story.

**Broken**

Chapter two

Sam glanced over at Dean and could see him talking to two girls. He saw Dean say something to one of the girls and they all looked over toward him. Sam knew what his brother was doing; he was trying to set him up on a date, a date he didn't want. He drained his beer and walked over to Dean.

"I think I'm going to head on out."

"Why, the night's still young?"

"I'm just tired, I just want to go back and get a little rest."

Dean turned toward the girls and introduced his brother.

"This is my 'don't know how to have fun' brother Sam, this is Alice and Sheila."

"Hi." Both girls said smiling up at him.

"Nice to meet you." Sam gave the girls a smile then looked at Dean. "See ya back at the motel." He turned to leave.

Dean looked at the girls and shrugged his shoulders then he reached in his pocket for his keys.

"Here." He held up the keys. "I'll get a ride home."

"No, keep the keys. I'd rather walk." Sam didn't wait for Dean to answer. He walked back to the bar, bought a six pack of beer, then left.

Dean stood staring at the door tempted to follow his brother but then decided against it. If Sam didn't know how to have a good time that was his problem. He on the other hand was having fun and saw no reason to end it.

**The motel**

It was a long walk and Sam was tired when he got back to the motel. He hoped between the walk and the beer he'd be able to finally get some sleep tonight. He popped a beer open and stood at the doorway drinking it as he looked out into the night. Why couldn't he shake this terrible depression he wondered? He had lost people before and although it tore him apart he had always managed to hold it together. And he still had Dean. He knew if it wasn't for Dean he probably wouldn't be here. But he couldn't shake the feeling that something was going to happen to Dean and he would be alone, and that was one thing he couldn't take. A tear ran down his face as a terrible loneliness overcame him. All he wanted was his family safe and to be with Jessica. That's all he ever wanted. But his family wasn't safe….in fact most of his family was gone. And Jess…. his beautiful Jess, was gone too. He finally let the tears flow. Why couldn't he be strong like Dean? Dean always managed to hold his emotions in, never showed the world his true feelings. Why was he so damn weak? He was tired, tired of everything, tired of getting up in the morning to face another day without Jess, tired of being on the move all the time, tired of killing, and tired of feeling so damn depressed. He shoved his hand in his pocket as he turned back into the motel room and it was then he felt the small hard round object in his pocket. He pulled his hand out and looked at the blue pill. The face of the man who had given him the pill flashed in front of Sam and he remembered him saying that the pill would make him feel better. Would it? Would this one little pill snap him out of his depression? He never took drugs before and didn't think he ever would but if this one little pill could make him feel better…. He could see the man's face in front of him smiling and telling him that ever thing would seem better; all he had to do was take the pill. Sam decided that anything would be better then the way he was feeling right now. He popped the pill in his mouth and washed it down with a swallow of beer.

**The bar**

Dean had spent the night dancing with both girls and at one point went into the dark parking lot and made love to one of them in his car. But it was getting late and he figured he better get going before his brother came looking for him, plus he didn't like leaving Sam alone for long in a strange town. He was just finishing his last drink when he looked up to see Sam walking into the bar. He couldn't believe it, Sam was actually smiling.

"Hey." Dean put up his hand and waved his brother over. "I never thought I'd see you in here again."

"Couldn't sleep and then I figured why not come back and party a little."

"Party a little? Who are you and what did you do with my brother?" Dean asked jokingly, he knew Sam never partied, at least he never saw him partying.

"Would either of you two like to dance?" Sam held his hand out to the girls standing with Dean.

"Sure." The brunette smiled and took his hand.

Dean watched in disbelief as Sam walked out onto the dance floor.

"You look like you're in shock." The blonde said looking at Dean.

"It's just that…my brother…well…I never saw him like this before. Usually he's all moody and quiet."

The girl looked out on the dance floor and smiled.

"Well he doesn't look like he's inhibited to me. You know you're brother's a really good dancer."

Dean watched as Sam danced across the floor. What the hell was going on he wondered?

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

Thanks for the reviews, I appreciate them.

**Broken**

Chapter three

**Later - back at the motel**

"What the hell was that all about?" Dean asked Sam as he tossed his jacket on the bed as they walked into the motel.

"Hey, you told me to have a little fun….well I had a little fun." Sam took off his jacket and dropped it on the floor.

"You're drunk aren't you?" Dean said smiling. He rarely saw Sam drunk but in a way he was glad to see his brother actually having a good time instead of moping around.

"Oh I had a few."

"I think more then just a few. I saw you boozing it up at the bar." Dean looked over at the empty six pack and realized his brother had finished off the entire pack. "You drank that whole six pack? What the hell's going on with you?" Dean put his hand on Sam's arm. "This isn't like you….You don't drink like this."

"Nothing's going on with me." He pushed Dean's arm away. "You told me to have fun so I had a little fun."

"A little fun? Sam one minute you're moping around here all depressed and the next minute you're flying around the dance floor like John Travolta. What's up?"

"Nothing's up. You wanted me to get out and have fun….well, I had fun." Sam walked over to the bed and flopped down on it. "Now get off my back."

"What the hell's going on with you Sam?" Dean said walking over.

"Look I told you, nothings going on. Now shut up and get off my back."

"Get off your back? I haven't even begun to get on it yet. And by the way, I don't like this smart ass attitude of yours."

"Well that's just too bad isn't it? You don't like it then do something about it tough guy."

Dean was about ready to pull Sam off the bed but then thought better of it. He knew this wasn't Sam, at least not when he was sober. He figured he'd let him sleep it off and hopefully in the morning things would be back to normal.

**The next morning**

Dean woke up to find Sam standing at the door looking out.

"Hey Sunshine… you feeling better this morning?" Dean smiled as he got up. He knew Sam was in for one hell of a headache and he was looking forward to kidding him about it.

"Dean….I'm sorry about last night. I guess I had a little too much to drink." Sam said turning around and looking at him.

Dean was taken back by the sad look in Sam's eyes and could tell his brother was back in his depressed mood.

"You know Sam I don't know whether I like you better like this or all jazzed up. You need to level out somewhere in the middle."

"I will." Sam looked at Dean and gave him a sad smile. "I'm sorry I've been such a pain in the ass lately. It's just that…" Sam shook his head sadly and looked away.

"What is it Sam?" He didn't want his brother to shut him off like that; he needed to know what was bothering him. Maybe then he could find some way to help him.

"I miss Dad Dean…" Sam's eyes filled up. "I miss Jess, and I never even knew Mom but I miss her too."

"It's funny to hear you say that you miss Dad. All you guys ever did was fight."

"I know…and I wish I could take it back…but I can't. I wish I could take a lot of things I said to him back but…"

"But it's too late. All those words between you two, it's too late." Dean knew Sam felt guilty that he had even tried to start an argument with their dad the day he died. But he also knew a lot of the time Sam was the one who was right when he and their dad were arguing but he had never told him that, he had always sided with their dad.

"I know…" Sam swallowed hard and headed for the door, he didn't want Dean to see the tears that were forming in his eyes. "I'm just going to go for a little walk, just need to clear my head a little."

"Want me to go with you?"

"No….I just need to get my head together. I won't be long."

Dean watched as Sam put his hands in his pockets and with his head hanging down headed down the street. He wanted to follow him, he had seen the tears, but decided Sam maybe just needed a little alone time.

As Sam walked a horrible feeling of loneliness once more surrounded him. He walked for about an hour then somehow he found himself back at the bar. The man who had given him the pill was leaning against the building smoking a cigarette.

"Nice day isn't it?" The man said smiling.

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

Thanks for the reviews. And to the reviewer who thinks she has to use all caps to yell at me to get my attention….. I don't mind your criticism but hey, I'm not a writer I only write for fun which I point out in my profile. The chapters are short because I try to update each day and that's the way I like to write. In other words….. I apologize for any grammar or punctuation problems she said I have but….. hey, if you don't like it, don't read it, no one is holding a gun to your head. ….. Enough said……

**Broken**

Chapter four

"Yeah, I guess you could say so." Sam looked at the man. He knew he should walk away but, something was keeping him there. "Would you….ummmm….never mind." Sam turned to walk away.

"You started to say something ….what was it?"

"It was nothing…I really need to get going." Sam started walking away.

"Did you take the pill I gave you?"

Sam turned around but didn't say anything.

"Did you take the pill I gave you?" The man repeated.

"Yeah… yeah I did."

"And you felt better didn't you?"

"I guess." Sam knew he had actually felt a lot better. The pill had taken the edge off of his depression.

"Well there's more where that came from." The man reached in his pocket and pulled out a vial full of blue pills.

"No…sorry…" Sam started backing away. "I'm really not interested." Sam had never taken drugs before and he knew Dean would kick his butt if he found out he had.

"Why feel bad when one little pill can make you forget your pain?"

"Look, I'm really not interested…I got to get back to my brother."

"Your brother isn't going to be able to make you feel better….How 'bout I give you a few to hold you over….Then if you want more…You know where to find me."

"No thanks….I really got to get going." Sam wanted nothing more then to walk away but he felt frozen to the spot.

The dealer stepped closer to Sam and held his hand out.

"Go ahead, take them….I know you want to." The man smiled. "No charge."

Sam hesitated.

The man reached out and took Sam's hand and placed two of the pills in the palm of his hand.

"Keep them for an emergency." The man smiled then walked away.

Sam looked at the pills in his hand and was just about to toss them down a storm drain when he hesitated. The man was right the pills did make him feel better, in fact they made him feel a lot better, they took the edge off of his depression. Sam stood for a few seconds staring at the pills then popped them into his pocket. _Just for an emergency_ he thought as he headed back to the motel.

**Later – back at the motel**

"Feel better?" Dean asked when Sam walked in.

"Yeah."

It was obvious to Dean he wasn't.

"Sam what the hell's going on with you? You're walking around here moping all the time and then the next minute you're flying high like you don't have a care in the world. What's up?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing? Damn it Sammy talk to me."

"Dean, there's nothing to talk about I'm fine."

"You don't look fine, is it Dad Sam?"

"What?"

"Is this about Dad dying? Is that what has you upset?"

"Of course I'm upset about Dad, why wouldn't I be?"  
"You act like you feel guilty about it or something." Sam turned away from him. "Sam….Dad died because of me….Because he gave his life to bring me back. I wish to hell he hadn't but he did…. It's my fault that Dad's dead. Is that what you're upset about? … You wish Dad was here instead of me don't you?"

"No Dean that's not it…I'm glad you're here…I don't know what I'd do if you weren't…. And it's not your fault Dad's gone…it's mine."

"What are you talking about?"

"Mom…Jess….Dad…" Sam's eyes filled up with tears. "They're all dead because of me."

"That's not true Sam." Dean swallowed hard when he saw the anguish in his brother's eyes.

"It isn't? Dean you know damn well it is. The demon wants me and kills anyone who stands in its way."

"Sam you were only six months old when Mom died, how could it possibly be your fault?"

"Because she died trying to protect me. You heard the demon yourself Dean…He said Mom and Jess died because the demon has plans for me and they were in the way. And Dad died because he went after the demon, because of what it did to Mom….I think it's a little obvious it's all my fault Dean…They're all dead because of me." Sam choked on his words and blinked back tears as he turned around and headed for the door.

"Where the hell are you going now?"

"Out….I just need to get my mind together."

"You just got back Sam!" When Sam continued out the door Dean grabbed his jacket. "Hold on, I'll come with you."

"No…"

"Sam…"

Sam could hear the worry in his brother's voice and stopped in the doorway but didn't turn around.

"Dean I'll be okay…I just need to be alone, I won't be long."

Sam quickly pulled the door shut behind him cutting his brother off from following him. He took the pills out of his pocket and hesitated for a second before popping them in his mouth as he walked up the street.

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

I appreciate the reviews, thanks. Sorry for the ranting yesterday, I'm having a lot of family health problems right now and I was just hurt by the reviewer who was so critical. I just didn't need that right now on top of everything else. Guess I could go and check out her story and leave some hurtful remarks but I'm not like that. Everybody's writing style if different so who's to judge, not me. And thank you so much to the reviewers who said such nice kind things. You have no idea how much your words meant to me. Like I said, I never said I was a good writer, I just enjoy playing with the boys for awhile…… : -) And as long as you guys enjoy reading my stories I'll keep writing them, mistakes or not. And to 'Just a Fan' since I can't reply to you personally just want to say thanks for your kind words…..I can't believe you've been with me since my Fastlane days. :-) Okay I'll shut up now……..

**Broken**

Chapter five

**Two hours later**

Dean hadn't followed Sam; he knew his brother needed some space. But when he wasn't back in two hours he started to get worried. He knew the streets were dangerous; he had read about the muggings and robberies in the area. Dean knew his brother could take care of himself but he also knew Sam wasn't thinking straight and that he was upset.

"Damn it Sammy." He said out loud to himself as he grabbed his jacket. "I'm so going to beat your ass." As worried as he was he was angry too, angry because with the business they were in Sam should have checked in with him. They had an unspoken rule that when they were in a new town and away from each other they'd keep in touch. Yeah, he was going to kick Sam's ass when he found him.

**An hour later**

Dean had driven around the streets and now an hour later was really beginning to get worried when he still hadn't found Sam. He pulled up at the bar they had been in earlier and went in and walked up to the bartender.

"Hey." He smiled. "I was in earlier with a big dark haired guy and I was wondering if you saw him lately."

The bartender nodded to a crowded table over in the corner where a group of girls sat around the table laughing.

"Your friend's been here for the last couple of hours." The bartender said as he walked away to serve a customer.

"You're so dead." Dean said as he stormed over to the table pissed off that his brother had made him worry. Sam was sitting there laughing with the girls as he bought them drinks. Dean watched as some of the girls began taking turns kissing him.

"What the hell are you doing?" Dean glared down at Sam who smiled up at him.

"Oh….hi…." Sam smiled at Dean then looked at the girls. "This is my big brother….Dean."

"Come on we're getting out of here." Dean didn't acknowledge the girls but instead reached down and grabbed Sam by his arm and pulled him up.

"Whoa…whoa….wait a minute." Sam said as he twisted out of Dean's grasp. "I'm having a good time, I'm not going anywhere." He sat back down. "But you can join us if you want."

"I'm not joining anybody and you're coming with me." He once more grabbed Sam's arm.

"I'm not going anywhere with you!" Sam stood up and pushed Dean away. "Just get the hell out of here and leave me alone!"

"Sam I'm not fighting you here." Dean stood his ground.

"Well then get the hell out of here."

Sam's speech was slurred and Dean could tell he was drunk, all the more reason to get him out of there and back to the motel. He could see a group of men in the bar watching his brother, probably just waiting for a chance to jump him when he left the bar.

"Sam we're leaving here together and I don't want to hear no bullshit from you." Dean grabbed Sam's arm again but this time Sam spun around to punch him but Dean easily stepped aside and the punch sailed harmlessly past his face. Sam then lost his balance and fell to the floor. Dean reached down to help him up but Sam slapped his hand aside and attempted to stand on his own but ended up falling back to the floor. "Come on Sammy, let's get out of here." Dean reached down again and this time Sam accepted his hand and allowed Dean to pull him up. Sam kept his eyes downcast and wouldn't look Dean in the eyes as he led him to the door.

**Back at the motel**

Dean opened the door and Sam staggered into the room and fell onto the bed. Dean walked over and stood over him.

"Do you want to explain to me what the hell's going on with you?"

"Oh man…." Sam moaned as the room started to spin.

"Sam this isn't like you…what the hell's wrong?"

"Oh God I'm going to be sick…." Sam groaned as he crawled out of bed and headed for the bathroom.

Dean shook his head sadly as he listened to his brother throwing up. He waited awhile then knocked on the door.

"You okay in there?" When Sam didn't answer Dean pounded harder on the door. "Sam you okay?" When he still didn't answer Dean opened the door and stuck his head in. Sam was sitting on the floor leaning against the wall, his head back and his eyes slightly opened. "Sam?...Sammy?" Dean walked over and put his hand on Sam's shoulder. As soon as Sam was touched his body slowly slid down the wall and he fell unconscious to the floor.

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

Sorry for my little mental breakdown with the last two chapters, just having a very bad week. Didn't mean to flip out…. Thanks for the reviews, I really appreciate them.

**Broken**

Chapter six

"Sammy!" Dean hurried to his brother's side. He had seen alcohol poisoning before and knew what he had to do. He pulled his brother over to the toilet and hung Sam's head over the bowl. He then shoved his finger down Sam's throat causing him to gag and throw up. Dean continued until his brother had nothing left in his stomach. He then got behind Sam and grabbing him under his arms pulled him out of the bathroom and over to the bed then lifted him up onto it. He then took Sam's shirt off and ran back to the bathroom where he soaked towels in cool water and began placing them on his brother's body, over his chest and under his neck. After a few minutes Sam began moaning and pushing Dean's hands away as he began to come around.

"Come on Sammy wake up." Dean began gently slapping Sam's face, he knew if he could get Sam to respond and keep him awake he should be okay.

"Leave me alone…" Sam moaned.

"Leave you alone? Sam you'd be dead if I had left you alone!"

"Oh God I feel lousy…."

"No kidding …." Dean took the towels off of Sam and tossed them on the floor.

"Ohhhhh man…." Sam put his hand up to his forehead.

"I hope you learned your lesson…What the hell were you thinking, you could have died drinking like that."

"Maybe I should have."

"What the hell's that suppose to mean?"

" Nothing." Sam tried to sit up but everything started spinning and he fell back to the bed, Dean reached over and helped him up to a sitting position. He then held him steady for a few seconds until Sam could sit on his own.

"Damn it Sammy what the hell's going on with you?"

"What's going on with me?...You really want to know what's going on with me?"

"Yeah Sam I do."

"What's going on with me is that just about everyone I care about is gone….except you….And I'm beginning to think that maybe I should be gone too."

"What? So that's what this is all about? You're slowly committing suicide?" Sam refused to look his brother in the eyes. Dean suddenly stood up. "You selfish son of a bitch! You're just thinking of yourself because you're hurting. Well, what about me? Don't you think I'm hurting too? Don't you think I miss Mom and Dad? Damn it Sammy you're all I have left."

"I know you're hurting Dean." Sam said softly. "And it's because of me you're hurting. Everyone is dead because of me. Don't you understand that? Don't you understand how I feel? I'm the reason you're hurting. All of them would still be alive if the demon hadn't come for me that night. I'm the reason they're all dead. How the hell am I suppose to live with that?" Sam looked at Dean as his eyes welled up with tears. "You're hurting because of me Dean….I'm the reason for all this damn pain in our lives."

"Damn it Sammy you were only a baby when Mom died, how could it possibly be your fault?"

Sam wiped angrily at his tears embarrassed that he had broken down in front of Dean.

"If the demon hadn't come into my room that night Mom would still be alive….And the only reason Jess is dead is because of me… and Dad…" Sam swallowed hard. "Dad died trying to get his revenge on the demon for killing Mom. Yeah Dean…. I'd say this whole mess is my fault."

"But you were only six months old Sam…. You didn't ask the demon to come after you….You got to stop blaming yourself. And you didn't kill Dad. Dad died so I could live. Dad's death is my fault, not yours. So if you want to blame anyone for Dad dying, blame me."

"Dad might have died to save your life but he wouldn't have been out running around looking for demons if it wasn't for me. I'm the source of everyone's unhappiness….I'm the reason everyone died." Sam choked up as he looked at Dean and tears now ran down his face.

Dean swallowed hard and blinked back tears as he looked at the anguish on his brother's face. He knew guilt was a hard thing to live with….it could eat you up alive and that was just what it was doing to Sam. He knew first hand what guilt was all about. His dad had given up his life so he could live after the accident and he would have to carry that guilt around with him the rest of his life. But he knew his baby brother wasn't to blame for any of this. Yeah Sam was right the demon wanted him and was slowly killing anyone who stood in the way. But Sam was innocent, hell he was only a baby when the demon first stood at his bedside. It wasn't his fault that he was chosen….and somehow he had to make him see that.

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

Thanks for the reviews, I appreciate each of them.

**Broken**

Chapter seven

"Look Sam, we both had a long day and a little too much to drink. Why don't we get some rest, things will look better in the morning."

"The morning won't change anything." Sam looked into Dean's eyes and swallowed hard when he saw the worry in them. The last thing he wanted was to worry his brother; none of this was his fault. "Okay….okay…" Sam relented. "We'll get some rest." He said heading toward his bed.

"Sam, things _will_ look better in the morning….you'll see." Dean hoped that was true. He had never seen Sam this depressed before and it worried him. His brother had lost too many people in his young life and it was obvious it was beginning to take its toll on him. "And Sam…"

Sam turned around and looked at him.

"You had enough booze for one day. You _are_ going to stay in aren't you? I mean I don't have to stay awake all night and guard the door do I?"

Sam gave him a little smile.

"No, you don't have to guard the door, I'm not going anywhere. Right now all I want to do is crash." Sam said as he lay down on the bed.

Dean went over to his own bed and lay down also, but he didn't sleep, he lay there awake until he heard Sam breathing deeply and realized his brother had fallen asleep. He was worried, he had no idea what was up with Sam. He had seen his brother drunk a few times, but nothing ever like this. He knew Sam was depressed over all the deaths of people he cared about but he had always managed to snap back. This time though Dean was really worried, this time Dean actually thought Sam might go over the edge. And if he did he didn't know if he could pull him back.

**The next morning**

Dean had spent most of the night lying awake keeping an eye on his brother. Sam had been restless most of the night and kept getting up and pacing the room. A few times he actually went outside and Dean had jumped up and watched through the window making sure he didn't go off by himself somewhere. But Sam had only stood on the small patio outside and stared off into the distance. By three o'clock the next morning Dean, exhausted, finally fell asleep.

Once Dean had fallen asleep Sam quietly got out of bed and stood looking down at his sleeping brother. He knew Dean had been watching him throughout the night and was glad he was finally getting some rest. He knew Dean was worried about him but the depression he felt right now was overwhelming and he tried his best to ignore it knowing he had promised his brother he wouldn't go out. But it was impossible to ignore and he knew what he had to do.

**The bar**

Sam headed for the bar, he needed something to pull him out of his mood and he knew where to find it. He found the dealer leaning against the wall outside the bar. He smiled when he saw Sam walking toward him.

"I figured you'd be back."

"How much for a bottle of those pills?"

"The going rate is two hundred."

"Two hundred?" Sam knew he didn't have that much on him.

"If you don't want them there are plenty of people out here that do."

"I only have fifty on me." Sam took out his money. "Could I just buy a few?"

"Sorry buddy…..two hundred for the bottle or no pills."

"Hold them for me, I'll be back."

The dealer smiled to himself as he watched Sam walk away, he knew he had him hooked.

Sam headed into the bar; he knew how to make some quick money. Once inside he immediately walked over to the pool table, he took out a twenty and put it on the table.

"Any one up for a game?" He asked looking at a bunch of bikers standing near the bar.

His challenge was immediately accepted.

**Motel**

Dean woke up suddenly and sat up in bed, he could sense something was wrong. He looked over at Sam's bed and saw it was empty. He then looked toward the bathroom but the door was open and he could tell Sam wasn't in there. Dean jumped out of bed and ran to the door, he opened it and looked outside hoping to see his brother standing on the patio, but he wasn't.

"Sam!" Dean called out into the night hoping Sam might be nearby but no one answered. "Damn it Sam I'm going to kill you!" Dean mumbled to himself as he quickly got dressed and jumped in his car. He knew of only one place Sam could be, but if he wasn't there he had no idea where he might have gone. Dean knew Sam had been depressed and he prayed he wasn't depressed enough to harm himself. He floored the accelerator and headed for the bar.

**The bar**

Sam knew enough to let the bikers win a few rounds of pool to make it look good and to draw them in, then he began winning round after round. After he had won around five hundred he decided to pack it in, he could tell the bikers weren't happy about losing their money to him.

"Well it's been nice fellas." Sam said as he picked up his winnings.

"You're not leaving without letting us try to win some of that back are you?" One of the bikers asked.

"Sorry, but I have a lot of bills to pay." Sam took a twenty out of the money and laid it on the pool table. "Here, buy yourselves a beer on me." He then headed outside and gave the drug dealer two hundred, then put the bottle of pills in his jacket and started heading back to the motel. . He hoped Dean hadn't woken up yet and he'd be able to slip in without waking him.

But just as he past an alley he felt arms reach out grabbing him and pulling him into the darkness of the alley..

"You ain't going anywhere buddy!" One of the bikers said as he and the rest of his friends circled Sam.

TBC


	8. Chapter 8

Once more thanks for all the kind reviews, I hope you guys aren't disappointed with the rest of this.

**Broken**

Chapter eight

Dean parked in the bar's parking lot and headed inside. He looked around and found no sign of Sam.

"Damn it Sammy where the hell are you?" Dean said softly as he walked over to the bartender.

"Hi." It was the same bartender he has talked to earlier. "I seemed to have lost my brother again." He said smiling. "Was he in tonight?"

"Yeah, about fifteen minutes ago… you must have just missed him."

"Thanks." Dean turned to leave; hopefully Sam was on his way back to the motel.

"You better tell your brother to watch who he plays pool with. Those bikers aren't anyone to mess around with."

"He was playing pool with bikers?" Dean turned back to the bartender; he couldn't believe his brother would be that stupid.

"Yeah, about four of them, he won a lot of money off of them too."

Dean looked around the bar and didn't see any bikers. Where were they? Had they followed his brother outside?

"Who left first?"

"Your brother did, the bikers left a short time later."

Dean quickly ran outside and looked around the almost empty parking lot.

"Sam!...Sammy!" Dean yelled into the night. _Damn it Sammy where are you?_ He began to walk to his car, maybe he had passed Sam on the drive over and he was already on his way back to the motel. He hoped that was true. He was just about to get in his car when he heard muffled sounds coming from the alley way and ran toward it.

**The alley **

Two men held Sam up while the other two took turns beating him. Two pool sticks lay in the alley the tips covered in Sam's blood. Dean could tell by the bruises on the biker's faces that Sam had not gone down without a hell of a fight.

"Leave him go!" Dean said as he slowly walked toward them.

"This doesn't concern you." One of the bikers that was holding Sam up said.

"Oh but I think it does…He's my brother and I'm only going to say this one more time….Let him go."

The bikers looked at each other and laughed. There were four of them and only one of him.

"We're just having a little discussion with your brother, he owes us some money. Don't worry; we won't kill him, we're just going to rearrange his face a little that's all."

When Sam heard his brother's voice he raised his head and Dean could see a deep gash above Sam's eye where he had been hit by a pool stick. He could feel the hate for these men growing in him as he watched the blood run down the side of Sam's face.

"Dean?"

"Yeah Sam it's me." Dean winced as he looked at his brother's bloody beaten face.

"Don't …don't get involved." Sam tried to warn Dean off, he knew this wasn't his fight.

"You're my brother Sam, I'm already involved."

Dean leaned down and picked up one of the pool sticks and held it tightly in his hand as he tapped it against the palm of his other hand.

"Let him go." He said as he walked toward the bikers.

But instead of letting him go one of the men slammed his fist into Sam's stomach, he gasped in pain as his legs gave out and now hung like a rag doll between the two bikers.

Seeing his brother further injured, Dean wasted no time delivering his brand of justice. The pool stick slammed down on the head of the closest biker knocking him to his knees. Dean then finished him off with a karate kick to the head. The two bikers that were holding Sam released him and he crumbled to the ground in front of them. The three bikers that were still standing then began to circle Dean.

"Only three? Seems like the odds are in my favor." Dean smiled at them then glanced down at his injured brother and it was all he needed to work himself up into a rage. He was actually going to enjoy beating the crap out of the men who had hurt his brother. The fight was on and it took only a few seconds for Dean to take down one of the men. As Dean fought Sam slowly managed to pull himself up and he too joined in on the fight. He took down one of the men while Dean easily took down the last one but not before getting sliced on the arm by the man's switchblade. Soon both brothers were standing over the four bikers.

"Thanks." Sam said looking over at Dean, he then noticed the blood on his brother's arm. "Dean you're cut!" .He started to reach for Dean's arm but he quickly pulled it away. "You okay?" Sam asked.

Dean only glared at him then turned and walked out of the alley. Sam slowly walked behind him, his arm around his bruised ribs.

"Look, I said thanks." Sam said when they reached the car. Dean spun around and looked at him.

"What the hell were you thinking taking on four bikers? You could have gotten yourself killed Sam. Sometimes I think you don't have a fucking brain in that head of yours."

"They jumped me, I didn't have a choice." Sam reached in his pocket and pulled out what was left of the money he had won hoping that once Dean saw the money he'd calm down a little. "Well at least they didn't get my money." He said holding it up for Dean to see.

"You came down here by yourself for a couple bucks? Damn it Sam, you know when we hustle pool we do it together. There's always the chance the losers aren't going to take too kindly to us relieving them of their money. We back each other up like we always do."

"You're my brother Dean, not my guardian. I don't need a baby sitter twenty four hours a day."

"The hell you don't! Look at you; you had the crap beaten out of you Sam."

"I had them exactly where I wanted them." Sam said trying to lighten the mood by joking but Dean wasn't in a joking mood.

"Where? With your blood all over them? They could have killed you Sam! Maybe I should have left them beat the crap out of you. Maybe they'd beat some sense into that thick head of yours."

"I could have taken them!"

"Yeah, it looked that way." Dean opened the car door. "Get in." He ordered Sam.

Sam who had already opened the passenger's door slammed it shut.

"I'll walk."

"Sam get the hell in the car!"

"I said I'll walk!" Sam started heading back toward the motel.

"Then walk!" Dean got in the car and sped off. He knew if he stayed with Sam he'd be tempted to beat some sense into him, so the best thing was to get away from him till they both had time to calm down. Besides, Sam already had the crap kicked out of him once tonight and the last thing he needed was another beating. Why was he acting so irresponsible Dean wondered? He could have gotten himself killed hustling those bikers. He looked in the rear view mirror to make sure Sam was heading back to the motel and not back into the bar. Dean swore if he saw him heading back to the bar he was going to go back and knock him out if he had to and drag his ass back to the motel. But what he really wanted to do was go back and put his arm around his brother and tell him he was sorry and that he understood what he was going through but his pride wouldn't let him. He was never a person to show his emotions openly and especially not to his brother. When he was certain Sam was heading back to the motel and not back to the bar he floored the accelerator, maybe the walk would do him some good he thought as he sped back to the motel.

TBC


	9. Chapter 9

Thanks again for the kind reviews, I appreciate them.

**Broken**

Chapter nine

**Later at the Motel**

Dean stood at the window looking out through the curtain. It had started to rain and he was trying to decide whether to go find Sam and drive him back to the motel or let him walk in the rain. Maybe the rain would beat some sense into him Dean thought, but when it started to thunder he decided to go find his brother. Just as he opened the door he saw Sam walking up the sidewalk and quickly shut the door, sat down, and turned the TV on not wanting Sam to know how worried he was about him.

Sam walked into the motel his clothes soaked and clinging to him. He didn't even glance at his brother as he walked into the bathroom and started the shower. Once in the shower a horrible feeling of loneliness came over him as he let the hot water run over his body and wash away the tears that ran down his face. When he stepped out of the shower he reached into his jacket pocket and took out the pills. He took two out and popped them in his mouth. He knew popping pills wasn't a solution to his depression and would only lead to more problems down the line but right now he didn't care, he only wanted the pain to end. He waited till his depression had started to lift then wrapped a towel around himself and stepping into the bedroom.

"You okay?" Dean finally said as Sam sat on the edge of his bed towel drying his hair.

"Yeah." Sam glanced over at Dean. "How's the arm?"

"It's fine, it wasn't deep."

"Good."

Sam finished drying his hair then threw the towel over his shoulder and looked over at his brother.

"Dean…I'm sorry …I'm sorry for being such a pain in the ass."

" 'Bout time you realized that." Dean looked over at Sam. "Sam….I'm worried about you. This going out boozing and fighting isn't like you. I think we need to get out of this town and find us a hunt…you know get back into what we do best."

Sam swallowed hard, he knew if they left town his pill supply would be gone, and he knew the pills were the only thing keeping him from drowning in his depression.

"No!" Sam blurted out.

"No? Why?" Dean looked at Sam surprised, wondering why he'd want to stay in town? "Why the hell not Sam? Our hunt's finished here, there's no reason to stick around."

"Dean we've been hunting steadily for the last few months. Why don't we take a little time off and just relax for awhile?" Sam said the first thing that came to his mind.

"We can relax on the drive up to our next hunt. There's a haunted church about a days drive from here, up in Kingston."

"Why don't you go ahead and take it? I'll catch up with you later."

"What? …There's no way I'm leaving you alone with the way you've been acting."

"I'm fine Dean; I just want a little time off."

"Well then we'll take a little time off."

"Like I said before Dean you don't have to baby sit me. Why don't you go off and take care of the hunt and I'll see you in a few days."

"Sounds like you're trying to get rid of me."

"Dean, we're not attached at the hip; we don't have to be constantly together."

"I realize that Sam." Dean snapped back at him. "But you've been acting like a real jerk lately. I'd like nothing more then getting away from you for a few days but you're making it impossible." Dean blurted out.

"Well then I'll make it easy for you." Sam got dressed, threw his belongings in a bag, and headed for the door.

"Where the hell do you think you're going?" Dean asked as he stood up.

"Out."

"You just had the crap kicked out of you Sam! What are you going to do if they come after you again?" Dean walked over and stood in front of him blocking the door..

"I can fight my own battles Dean."

"Yeah, it sure looked that way. In case you didn't realize it you were on the losing end buddy."

"What the hell is that suppose to mean? You don't think I could have beaten those guys?"

"Maybe when you're sober."

Sam glared at Dean then pushed him aside and opened the door. Dean, determined that he wasn't going to let Sam walk back into a fight, grabbed his arm, but Sam without warning spun around and punched him in the face. Dean stumbled backwards stunned but quickly recovered.

"You son of a bitch!" Dean shouted as he put his hand up to his bleeding mouth. He was just about to haul off and hit Sam but didn't. His brother had already been beaten badly tonight and he didn't want to add to his injuries.

"Go on your hunt Dean….I'll see you in Kingston in two days."

"If you don't show up, I'm not waiting for you!" Dean angrily turned away from Sam.

Sam didn't even glance back at Dean as he walked out and slammed the door behind him.

TBC


	10. Chapter 10

I appreciate the reviews, thanks.

**Broken**

Chapter ten

Dean walked into the bathroom and took a wet washrag and held it up to his bloody mouth. He didn't know if he was more pissed off at or worried about Sam. Part of him wanted to take off and leave his brother's sorry ass back in town to teach him a lesson, but another part knew he couldn't do that. He knew Sam was hurting and this was his way of handling it, he knew that, but he also knew Sam was acting like a loose cannon and could go off at any moment. There was no way he was going to leave him alone; and he knew what he had to do. He'd pack up and make Sam think he had left but instead he'd follow him to make sure he stayed safe and maybe figure out what was going on with him. Maybe all Sam needed was a little time on his own. He knew their dad's death had devastated his brother like it had him. But Sam also was dealing with their mom's death and Jessica's death, all of which he blamed himself for. Sam was hurting, and he was going to make sure he was there to pick up the pieces when he finally shattered. Dean went back to the bedroom and started tossing his belongings into his bag.

**Out on the street**

As soon as Sam started walking up the street he felt guilty. Dean had done nothing to him so why did he punched him? What the hell was happening to him? Why was he so jumpy, so angry? And why did he take it out on Dean? The pills had kicked in and he was actually feeling pretty good right now. He knew he had to go back and apologize to his brother; he didn't deserve any of this. Sam headed back to the motel to tell Dean he was sorry but as he approached the motel he could see Dean packing through the window. Tears came to his eyes, Dean wasn't kidding, he was actually going to leave him. He swallowed hard as he felt a cold chill go through his body, he never thought his brother would actually leave him. Sure he'd be pissed off that he punched him, maybe even punch him back, but he'd never leave him, especially after what happened last time he left him and he had run into Meg. But yet here he was, packing. Sam backed away from the window just as Dean looked up. He quickly turned and ran off into the darkness.

**Motel**

Dean had just looked up in time to see the devastation on Sam's face as he watched him from the window. He hurried to the door, opened it, and looked out into the night, but Sam was nowhere in sight.

"Sam! Sammy!" He shouted hoping Sam would hear him and come back, but he didn't. Dean blinked back tears; he couldn't get the look on Sam's face out of his mind. He had thought Sam wanted to be alone, but the look on his face said different. His brother had come back to the motel and saw him packing and thought he was leaving him, probably thinking that he didn't give a damn about him. "Damn it!" He mumbled to himself as he went back into the motel and grabbed his car keys. He jumped in his car and sped off to look for Sam.

**The streets**

Sam ran through the back alleys as tears streamed down his face. He never had felt so alone, his brother didn't want him, he knew that now. Dean knew he was hurting but he was still packing to leave…. to leave him behind. A terrible emptiness clawed at his heart. He had no one now. His mom, dad, and Jessica were gone, now soon Dean would be too. And it was all his fault…if it wasn't for him they'd all be alive. Maybe that's why Dean was leaving him. His brother knew their parents had died because of him, so no wonder he hated him. Sam ran until he couldn't run anymore. He stopped and stood with his back to a wall in an alley and slowly slid down it till he was sitting amongst the dirt and trash. He figured he was exactly where he belonged, in the dirt. He was tired of living and wished it was all over with, everyone would be happier if he wasn't around anymore. He reached in his pocket and took out the pills. As he did the dealer's face appeared in front of him telling him all he had to do was take the pills and everything would be alright. Sam knew it was true the pills did help, but the initial feeling he had gotten from them had quickly faded. He poured a few out in his hand then popped them in his mouth, if two worked, maybe three would work better. Right now he knew he needed something; anything to make him feel better, but what he really needed was to be with his brother…but Dean was gone and now all he had left were the pills. He waited till they started to kick in and hoped this time the feeling would last longer. He reached in his pocket and realized he only had a few hundred dollars with him and with his brother gone the first thing he needed to do was make some money and the only way to do that quickly was to hustle pool. He knew better then to go back to the bar where he had the run in with the bikers; he was still nursing injuries from the last fight and didn't want to get in another. He stood up and brushed himself off; he could actually feel the pills beginning to life him out of his depression. He then headed out of the alley to look for a bar where he could make a little money; with Dean gone he needed all he could get.

TBC


	11. Chapter 11

Thanks again for the reviews. I'm glad you like it so far. I really hope you guys aren't disappointed with the rest of it.

**Broken**

Chapter eleven

"Where are you Sammy?" Dean said as he looked up and down the street, Sam could be anywhere. Why the hell had he left his brother walk out the door? It was obvious Sam was hurting and instead of letting Sam know he was there for him, he had let his brother see him packing thinking he was leaving and didn't give a damn about him, and that couldn't be further from the truth. He loved his brother; even though he'd rather die then tell him that. Now Sam was out there in the city somewhere hurting, thinking his brother didn't even care enough about him to stay around and try to help him get through his depression. Dean swallowed hard as guilt overwhelmed him; he knew he had left Sam before. That was the time Sam had run into Meg who had been possessed by a demon and who had ended up almost killing both of them. "Damn it Sammy where the hell are you?" Dean blinked back tears as he remembered the look of devastation on Sam's face when he had looked in the window. "Damn it!" He said as he slammed his hand down on the steering wheel in frustration. He took out his cell phone and called Sam's number, but there was no answer so he waited till the voice mail came on.

"Sam….call me….I'm not going anywhere…we need to talk Sam… just call me as soon as you get this." Dean closed the cell phone and tossed it on the seat next to him, the seat that should have held his brother.

**The Woodland Café**

Sam had been playing pool and drinking for the last few hours never noticing the four men who sat watching him as they whispered to each other. As soon as Sam had walked into the bar he knew he should have turned around and left. All the men at the bar had shaved heads and as soon as Sam walked in with his long hair he could tell he was the main topic of their conversation. But he needed the money, Dean was gone and he was on his own, and the only way he knew how to make quick money was by hustling pool. He began taking on all challengers. He knew enough to let his opponents win some of the games to make it look good, but soon he began winning game after game and began taking in the money. When he had taken in about four hundred dollars he could feel the tension in the bar increasing and knew it was time to leave, he could always find another bar. He left the bar and stood near the alley looking up and down the street not really knowing what to do or where to go. A horrible feeling of loneliness overwhelmed him and he quickly wiped away the tears that threatened to run down his face. Dean was probably long gone by now and Sam wasn't even sure if his brother would want to see him again. A wave of guilt swept over Sam when he remembered how he had hit his brother before leaving. Dean had done nothing to deserve that and he really didn't blame his brother for leaving him. What was happening to him and why had he turned on Dean? It was like he wasn't even himself anymore. He knew all the deaths in his life were making him question everything but Dean had always been there for him and he shouldn't have taken it out on him. Even when they were ready to tear each other apart they had always been there for each other, but now he had driven his brother away. Why was he acting like such a jerk he wondered? Sure the deaths in his life had devastated him but why turn on his brother? Dean was all he had left in this world and now he was gone. He started walking down the street not really knowing where to go or what to do when he suddenly felt himself being grabbed from behind and forced into a dark alley.

"Hey!" Sam shouted as he tried to free himself from the two men who held him between them but a hard hit to his stomach from a third man caused him to double over in pain. "Omph…." Sam gasped as the air was forced from his lungs. _Oh God, not again_ he thought of his last beating as he tried to straighten up.

"Boy, aren't you a cute one." One of the men walked over to Sam and fingered his hair.

Sam struggled to free himself but was again punched in the stomach, this time the men released him and he fell to the ground where he was then kicked in the face. The blow stunned him and he fought not to black out.

"Hey pretty boy, you like men?" The one man said as he pulled Sam to his knees. Blood ran from his nose and mouth and he shook his head slightly trying to clear his mind. The attack had been so sudden and unexpected that he had been taken completely by surprise.

But when the man began groping him instinct took over and Sam punched the man in the stomach. He then stood up and turned toward the other men; he managed to take one down before being shot with a stun gun. The electric shock shot through his body and he fell to the ground where he was shocked repeatedly as the men stood over him laughing. Finally the shocks ended and he lay on the ground trying to catch his breath as he looked up at the four men standing over him.

"With that long hair of yours boy you could sure pass for a girl." One man taunted him.

"Maybe he is a girl….maybe we should try him out."

"You a girl?" A face leaned down and looked at him. "Hey pretty boy, you want to be a girl? Is that what you want to be?" The man laughed and looked at his friends. "I think this long haired freak wants to be a girl. What do you think?"

"I think we should try him out…. He looks like a girl….I wonder if he feels like a girl."

"You feel like a girl boy?" A face leaned down and laughed at him. "You're as pretty as a girl. Wonder what you taste like?" The man grabbed Sam by his shirt and pulled him to his knees then leaned down and kissed him on his lips. Sam spit in the man's face as he struggled unsuccessfully to get up, but between the pills he had taken and the alcohol he had drunk he was no threat to the four men. But he wasn't going to go down without a fight. Sam balled up his fist and slammed it into the man's groin. The man grabbed himself and fell to his knees in agony. One of his buddies immediately hit Sam on the side of his face with a beer bottle causing him to fall back to the ground. He lay on his back stunned as blood ran down from a cut next to his eye. He fought to stay conscious; he knew if he passed out he was doomed. Just then his cell phone rang and he weakly tried to reach for it but it was quickly grabbed by one of the men who flipped it open.

"Sam…" Dean's worried voice came over the phone. "Sam don't hang up…I need to talk to you….."

"He's a little busy right now."

"Who's this?" Dean asked.

"None of your business…. Who are you?" The man returned the question.

"This is his brother, is he there?" Dean wasn't sure what was going on, why would someone answer Sam's phone? Had his brother been in an accident?

"Ohhh he's here alright…me and my buddies are just about to have us a little fun with him."

"Who the hell is this?" Dean shouted into the phone. He didn't know what was happening but whatever it was it didn't bode well for his brother.

"Oh, just someone who is going to turn your brother into a bitch." The man said smiling down at Sam.

TBC


	12. Chapter 12

Thanks for the nice reviews; I'm so worried you guys aren't going to like the rest of it. Please don't expect too much.

**Broken**

Chapter twelve

"You son of a bitch, you leave him alone!" Dean shouted into the phone, he never felt more helpless in his life. His brother needed him but he had no idea where he was, but he knew what the man intended to do to him and if he couldn't get there in time…..He tried not to let his mind go there, he was going to find Sam and find him in time he wouldn't let himself think otherwise.

"Don't worry, we'll be gentle with him."

Dean could hear the man laughing as he hung up the phone. He floored the accelerator and headed for town then drove up and down the dark streets looking for any sign of his brother. He knew if Sam had been taken into a building he'd never find him in time. All he could do was pray that they had Sam somewhere outside and that he could find him before it was too late.

"What the hell did you get yourself into Sammy?" He said softly his heart pounding, his eyes tearing up with worry as he looked up and down the alleys.

**The Alley**

"Maybe our friend wants something to drink to loosen him up a little." One of the men said as he pulled out a bottle of whiskey. "Hold him down."

Two of the men grabbed Sam and pinned him to the ground while the third pinched his nose shut forcing him to open his mouth in order to breathe.

"Taste good punk doesn't it?" The man with the bottle began to pour the whisky down Sam's throat. He managed to swallow some of it before choking on the burning liquid as it ran down his throat and into his windpipe. They finally released him and stood back laughing as Sam lay on the ground coughing as he tried to catch his breath. One of them then walked over to him and kicked him hard in his ribs then leaned down and reached in his pocket and took out his wallet. He removed Sam's money and shoved it in his pocket.

"Guess you won't be needing this either." He said smiling as he put Sam's wallet in his other pocket. "Now let's have us a little fun." The man said reaching for Sam.

The man's friends started laughing as they began pulling Sam's shirt off. Sam began to panic; he knew what the men were planning.

"No….please…." Sam grabbed at his shirt as it was pulled away from him. He once more tried to get up but was kicked hard in the stomach. He yelped in pain and rolled on the ground, his arms wrapped protectively around his stomach. Normally these four men wouldn't have presented much of a problem for him; both he and Dean had extensive fight training. But between the pills he had taken, and the booze he had been forced to drink he was no match for them. Tears came to his eyes as he felt them begin to tug at his belt. He struck out at them and managed to take one down but a hard kick to his head rendered him semi conscious. All he could do was lay on his back as his world spun out of control.

**The street**

Dean kept trying to raise Sam on his cell phone and was beginning to get frantic when no one answered. He tried to keep his mind off of what the man could be doing to his brother. If they hurt him in any way he swore he'd kill them.

He drove down the streets looking back and forth between the alleys praying he'd see his brother.

He was just beginning to think it was hopeless when he noticed a disturbance down one of the alleys. He spun his car into the alley and turned on his high beams. In the distance he could see a group of men turn to look at him and could hear them yelling at him to leave, that whatever was going on there wasn't his business. There was no sign of Sam so Dean shifted his car into reverse and was just about to back up when he spotted the body on the ground behind the men. He shifted back into drive and floored the accelerator. Even if it wasn't Sam, he could tell the person needed help. He stopped a few feet from the body and jumped out of the car. At first he didn't even recognize his own brother; Sam's face was covered in blood and bruises and was barely recognizable. The men had been undressing his brother and Sam now lay shirtless with his jeans unzipped and pulled slightly down. He appeared to be unconscious but Dean breathed a sigh of relief when he detected the steady rise and fall of his chest, at least he was alive. Dean had never felt this much rage in his life. He slowly walked toward the men, his face etched with hate.

"Which one of you wants to die first?" Dean asked as he glared at the four men as he clenched his fists..

"You must be the kid's brother…Seems like the poor boy can't hold his liquor." One of the men said as he glanced down at Sam mockingly.

"Well I guess you're first." Dean said as he walked toward the man.

The man laughed, he was at least a head taller then Dean and fifty pounds heavier. He figured he wouldn't have any problem taking him down….he was wrong.

TBC


	13. Chapter 13

I appreciate the kind reviews, thanks.

**Broken**

Chapter thirteen

The fight was over in a matter of minutes. Dean didn't keep his promise though, he didn't kill the men, he only made them wish they were dead. When he was done with them their broken beaten bodies lay scattered around the alley. Dean himself had a few bruises on his face and stomach but he didn't even feel them as he ran to his brother's side and knelt down next to him.. Sam lay on his back, a large bruise on the side of his face where he had been kicked already turning purple, and a deep gash above his eye covered the side of his face with blood. Dean blinked back tears as he tugged Sam's pants back up and buckled his belt. He then breathed a sigh of relief; he had gotten to his brother before they had hurt him even worse.

"Sam? Sammy? Come on buddy talk to me." He said as he pulled his brother into his arms. He could smell the booze on Sam's body and could see the empty whiskey bottle lying nearby. Dean turned Sam's head to the side and gently examined the bruise on the side of his face; if the kick had been a little higher and had hit his temple his brother could have been killed. He glanced over at the men who had hurt Sam and fought the urge to go over and finish them off. He knew he was already wanted for murder, what difference would four more make. His hand started to reach for his knife but when he heard Sam moan his full attention turned back to his brother. He reached down and patted Sam's face "Sam…come on buddy you got to wake up for me." Finally Sam's eyes flew open and he began to fight Dean, not realizing it was his brother he was fighting. Dean grabbed his arms and held him down.

"Sam, it's me, it's me!"

"Dean?" Sam asked as his brother's face slowly came into focus.

"Yeah." Dean put his hand on Sam's chest to hold him down when he attempted to get up. "Just take it easy for a minute or two." He winced as he looked at Sam's face and chest. He could also see a deep purple bruise forming over Sam's ribs and hoped they weren't broken. "Damn bastards!" He said through clenched teeth.

"Dean…my money….they got my money." Sam managed to get out between breaths.

"Don't worry about it Sam, I'll get it back. Just breathe easy for a few minutes." Dean reached out and gently ran his hand over Sam's rib cage. He couldn't tell for sure but he didn't think any were broken probably just badly bruised. After a few minutes he helped Sam stand up, but he was dizzy and leaned on his brother for a few seconds. Once he had his balance Dean walked him over to a wall and left him lean against it while he went over and went through the men's pockets. He found Sam's wallet and cell phone and put them in his own pocket. Then not sure how much money the men had taken from his brother he removed their wallets and emptied them. It was a small price to pay for what they had done to Sam and for what they were about to do to him. He then walked back over to the man who had Sam's cell phone in his pocket and delivered a hard kick to his ribs figuring he was the one he had talked to on the phone. "You're lucky I don't kill you you bastard." He said through clenched teeth, he then turned back to Sam. "Let's get you back to the motel." Dean put his brother's arm over his shoulder and began to lead him back to the car.

He opened the passenger's door and helped Sam in then took the first aide kit out of the trunk and cleaned the blood off of his brother's face. He winced in sympathy as he cleaned some of the deeper cuts.

"I thought…I thought you left." Sam said as he put his head back and shut his eyes, his head was pounding and everything was starting to spin.

Dean shut Sam's door then climbed in the driver's side. He felt a cold stab of guilt shoot through his heart as he remembered his brother's look when he had seen him packing.

"No Sam….I didn't leave. I never was going to."

"Sorry…sorry I hit you."

"I'll collect on that later." Dean put his arm on the back of the seat and looked over at his brother. "What the hell happened out there?"

"I won some money and I guess they wanted it." Sam knew it was more then money that the men wanted but he wasn't about to tell Dean that.

"You're getting rusty Sam; there were only four of them." Dean glanced over at Sam; he knew his brother would die of embarrassment if he knew that Dean knew what the men were planning to do to him. He decided never to mention it unless Sam brought it up first.

"They jumped me." Sam knew if he had been himself, and not been doped up, being jumped wouldn't have been a problem. He could easily have taken on all four of them and come out the winner, but between the booze he had drunk at the bar and the pills he had taken he was no match for the men. His head was pounding and he tried to raise his hand up to his head but it wouldn't move…his whole body felt like it was going numb. He tried to talk to Dean but even that was impossible as he felt himself slipping into darkness.

"Those men really worked you over Sam. I think once you heal up some we better go over some of our moves." Dean smiled. "Remember when we were kids, Dad had us practicing our moves every night before we ate. He wouldn't give us dinner till we got in a few rounds…. Remember that time…." Dean looked over at Sam and could tell he wasn't listening. Sam stared straight ahead a blank look on his face. "If I'm boring you Sam just say so." When Sam still didn't move or even blink Dean began to get worried. His brother had taken a bad beating and seemed to be out of it. "Sam….Sammy….." Dean reached over and gave his brother a slight shove trying to get his attention. At Dean's touch Sam's body slumped over and fell against the door.

"Sam!"

Dean realized his brother was in worse shape then he had thought as he spun the car around in a U turn and sped toward the hospital.

TBC 


	14. Chapter 14

Thanks so much for the kind reviews. Sorry for not posting for awhile but I couldn't get on the site…..

**Broken**

Chapter fourteen

Dean sped to the hospital and kept his hand down on the horn as he entered the emergency room lot. Two attendants rushed out to meet him.

"My brother's hurt…he passed out!" He shouted as he ran around to Sam's door and opened it. Sam's body slid into his arms.

"What happened to him?" One of the attendants asked as he and his partner took Sam out of Dean's arms and put him on a litter.

Dean knew they couldn't help but smell the alcohol on Sam but he also knew he couldn't tell them Sam was in a fight. If he did they would have to file a police report and that was one thing they tried to avoid at all costs. He was already wanted for murder and his brother would go right down with him as an accomplice.

"He had a little too much to drink and took a bad fall." He said as he followed the litter into the emergency room.

"You'll have to wait out here." A nurse said as the litter was pushed into the emergency room. "I need you to fill out some forms." She said as she took Dean's arm and pulled him away from the ER.

"He'll be alright won't he? My brother's going to be okay isn't he?" Dean asked as he kept glancing over at the doors to the ER while he filled out the forms. He needed to know what was happening, he needed to be with Sam.

"We have the best doctors checking him out. They'll do everything they can for him." The nurse reassured him. "I need your brother's medical card."

Dean reached into his pocket and took out Sam's wallet then removed a fake medical card from it and handed it to the nurse.

"Sam's really clumsy sometimes." Dean gave the nurse a small nervous smile as she filled out his medical information.

"Looks like your brother took a pretty nasty fall, he's really banged up."

"Yeah he did, right down a bunch of concrete steps."

The nurse smiled at him as she gave him back Sam's card.

"You can have a seat right over there. The doctor will be out to talk to you as soon as he takes care of your brother." She nodded her head toward the waiting room.

Dean walked over to the waiting room and sat down. He never took his eyes off the ER praying his brother was going to be okay. He knew Sam had taken a bad beating but he had seen him take worse ones and he always managed to come out of them okay. But he also knew any kind of head injury could be dangerous and Sam's injury could even prove fatal. He shook his head slightly and pinched the bridge of his nose…. No, he wasn't even going to allow himself to think that way. Sam was going to be fine, he had to be. He thought of the men in the alley and he could feel the hate and rage growing inside of him for them_. I should_ _have finished the bastards off for what they did to you Sam _he thought as helooked at the emergency room door.

**Later**

Finally in what seemed like an eternity the doctor came out. Dean immediately walked over to him.

"How's my brother?"

"We're still working on him."

"You've been working on him for the last two hours….how is he?" Dean's heart started pounding in his chest. He could tell by the doctor's expression that there was something he hadn't told him. "What's going on Doc?"

"How long has your brother been abusing amphetamines? "

"What?" Dean looked at the doctor in shock; he knew Sam didn't take drugs.

"How long has your brother been using drugs?"

"My brother doesn't take drugs. He drinks occasionally …. but he never used drugs."

"We got his blood work back, it's loaded with amphetamines. Between all the drugs that were in his system and the alcohol he consumed he's lucky he made it to the hospital alive."

Dean shook his head in disbelief. Drugs? Sam? His brother rarely drank more then a few beers and drugs were out of the question. His dad had read them both the riot act and told them he'd kick their butts if he ever saw them using drugs. But Sam _had _been acting strange lately and he _had_ been depressed, but drugs? No, Sam wouldn't do that, his brother knew he'd beat the crap out of him if he ever saw him using drugs. But then he remembered Sam coming into the bar all hyped up in a completely different mood then what he had left it. Could Sam really be taking drugs he wondered? And if he was why hadn't he noticed? He knew Sam was having mood swings the last couple of days but he never in a million years would have thought his brother was taking drugs. He had just assumed it was the booze and the depression that was causing Sam to act strange. Guilt washed over him, why hadn't he noticed?

"He's going to be alright isn't he?" Dean was almost scared to ask the doctor as he looked at his grim face.

"It's too early to tell. Your brother has some badly bruised ribs plus a mild concussion and between that and the drugs and alcohol in his system ….I just don't know. We did everything we can for him but he's still unconscious. Now all we can do is just wait and see."

TBC


	15. Chapter 15

Well this is the last chapter. Thanks for the kind reviews I really appreciated them and as usual I hope no one is disappointed with the ending.

**Broken**

Chapter fifteen

**Three hours later**

There was nothing else that could be done for Sam so he was moved out of the ER and to a room. Now all Dean could do was sit back and wait for him to wake up.

Dean sat next to his bed staring at his brother's pale features. He still couldn't believe his brother was on drugs. Sam could barely hold his booze let alone drugs.

"Sammy." He said softly. "Why? Why drugs? Why now?" He gently pushed Sam's long dark hair out of his eyes. _What the hell's going on with you… and why hadn't I_ _noticed?_ He thought as he blinked back tears. _I should have seen the pain you were in and_ _made you sit down and talk to me about it_. _I'm sorry Sammy…. I'm sorry you thought you had to go out on the streets looking for something that you should have found right here. _ He knew Sam had been acting strange lately but never in a million years would he have thought Sam would take drugs. Sam was too straight lace to do something like that. So what had happened, why had his brother turned to drugs?

He knew Sam hadn't been himself lately and had seemed really down but he had always managed to hold it together, but lately his brother went from depression to elation in a matter of minutes. If he was on drugs it had started in this town and it was going to end in this town. As soon as he could he was getting Sam away from there and give him a serious talking to. There was no way in hell he was going to lose his brother to drugs.

**The next night**

Sam suddenly gasped in a breath of air and then began to moan as he slowly began to wake up.

"Sammy?" Dean stood up and put his hand on Sam's shoulder. "Come on buddy wake up for me." He said as he gently shook his brother's shoulder.

"Oh man…." Sam groaned as he slowly opened his eyes.

"Welcome back." Dean grinned down at his brother. "You had me scared to death….How are you feeling?"

Sam licked his dry lips before speaking.

"Like I went ten rounds with Ali."

"Yeah I thought you'd feel something like that. Doc says you have three bruised ribs and a slight concussion."

"What happened?" Sam couldn't remember how he had been injured all he knew was that he felt lousy.

"You got jumped….but I told the doctors you had a little too much to drink and fell down some steps." Dean hoped Sam wouldn't remember his encounter with the men and what they had almost done to him.

Sam nodded; he was use to their cover stories. He then reached for a glass of water on the table next to him and grimaced in pain as he stretched his injured ribs. Dean quickly walked over and handed the glass to him.

"Thanks." Sam said as he took a sip then handed the glass back to Dean.

"Sam….there's something I got to ask you."

"What?"

"Are you taking drugs?"

"What?" Sam glanced at Dean then quickly looked away.

"The doctor said you had drugs in your system. Sam, tell me the truth, are you using drugs?"

At first Sam was going to deny it, but it was obvious Dean knew.

"I was feeling a little down and….well some guy at the bar offered me a pill. He said it would make me feel better."

"And you took it? What are you nuts? Sam I thought you were smarter then that. What are you doing taking drugs off of some guy you don't even know?" Dean shook his head. "What the hell's going on with you?"

"I just needed something, something to get me through the day."

"Why didn't you talk to me instead of going to some guy for a quick fix?"

"Because…."

"Because what?"

"Because I didn't want you to think I was weak." Sam blurted out. "I didn't want you to think you had to baby sit me all the time. You have a life too you know, you don't have to be watching me all the time."

"I never thought you were weak Sam. You're just…sensitive. You just feel more then most people and that can get you hurt."

Sam looked down, upset that he had caused Dean so much trouble.

"I'm sorry for being such a pain in the ass….and …and I'm sorry I hit you, I shouldn't have done that. I don't know what got into me…" Sam said as his eyes welled up with tears.

"No problem….But you'll owe me for that, and I'll be sure to collect on it later." Dean gave a small smile then looked Sam in the eyes. "You through with the pills?... Because if you aren't I'm hogtying you and tossing your ass in the trunk until you are. I mean it Sam, I ever catch you taking drugs again I'm going to beat your ass from here to Hell and back again."

Sam hesitated for a few seconds. He knew the pills helped take the edge off of his depression and a part of him didn't want to give them up. But his brother was more important then his dependency on the pills. He nodded toward the closet.

"There are a few in my jacket pocket."

Dean walked over to the closet and reached in Sam's pocket and pulled out the small bottle of pills. He then walked over to the bathroom and flushed them down the toilet.

"If you're feeling bad Sam you talk to me… we'll work it out together. You don't need pills; you come to me if you're feeling down…. Understood?"

"Yeah." Sam said softly looking up at Dean through his long bangs. "Thanks."

"For what?"

Sam gave a small smile, he knew his brother was uncomfortable with showing his emotions and didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable.

"Just thanks."

"Hey we don't have to hug or anything do we?" Dean asked returning Sam's smile.

"No." Sam gave a little laugh.

Dean looked toward the door to the room then leaned in close to Sam; he didn't want anyone who might be in the hallway to hear.

"Sam we got to get out of here before they find out you're awake. I don't think they believed me about you falling and I'm thinking they might call the cops once they know you woke up so they can question you." Dean looked down at Sam. "You think you can make it out of here?"

"Sure, just give me my clothes."

Dean took Sam's clothes out of the closet and handed them to his brother while he kept watch at the door. Sam slowly and painfully got dressed. When he was done he gingerly stood up and with Dean's support walked over to the door. Dean peeked around the door frame and when he saw the hallway was empty he helped Sam down the hallway and to the fire exit. Once outside they made it to the car and took off. They knew now that they had left the hospital they had to get out of town before the hospital alerted the police.

They sped back to their motel and Dean quickly threw their few belongings in the car, paid their bill, and left. Dean figured he'd get out of the county then find a motel where Sam could recuperate for a few days.

As they drove through the city streets on their way to the expressway they passed the bar where Sam had met the drug dealer. Sam glanced out the window and could see the dealer leaning against the wall that led into the alley. As they drove by the man looked at Sam and motioned for him to come over. Sam quickly looked away man and stared straight ahead. He swallowed the lump in his throat, he couldn't believe how hard it was for him to not get out of the car and go to the man. It was as if the man had some kind of control over him. He had only used the pills a few times but he could already feel an addiction toward them that was hard to fight.

"Is he the one you got the pills from?" Dean asked seeing his brother's reaction to the man.

Sam nodded but said nothing.

Dean looked in the rear view mirror as they drove by and saw the man watching them. He slowed down and was temped to pull over and beat the crap out of the man but that would only lead to more trouble, trouble they didn't need, so he kept driving. As he watched in the mirror he could swear he saw the man's eyes turn a glowing red as they drove away. He glanced over at Sam who hadn't noticed and was glad his brother was riding safely beside him. What the hell was going on he wondered? Had he just imagined it or had the dealer really been a demon? And why was he trying to tempt Sam into a life of drugs? Was the demon trying to lure Sam away from him? He knew he probably would never know the answers, but right now all he wanted to do was put distance between his brother and this town. He knew for now on he was going to keep a better eye on his baby brother and if Sam needed to talk he'd be there to listen to him. His brother was the most important thing in the world to him and he was going to make sure Sam knew he was always there no matter what; all he had to do was ask.

**The street**

The dealer watched as the car drove by, the demon inside of him snarling with hate as he cursed the closeness of the brothers. He had felt Sam's depression and had played on it by offering him a way out of it with the pills, pills that would one day make Sam his. He knew he had almost succeeded in driving a wedge between the brothers and swore one day he would. One day he'd succeed in pulling the brothers apart forever, it was only a matter of time. He watched the car turn a corner and disappear…. The brothers were safe for now…..but only for now.

The End

As usual I hope the ending didn't suck too badly.


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